What's a good law school pick up line?

I sit, scared to death, hoping that my professor does not call on me.  I admit it.  I did not do the reading.  I don't know why I didn't.  I had plenty of time.  I was in front of the computer all morning with the book wide open in front of me.  I just could not keep my eyes on the page.  I started to read and before I knew it I found myself day dreaming or thinking about something else.  It's getting colder out now and I thought, I can't believe I wasted all my whole fall in class.  But then again, I missed a ton of class.  And the truth of the matter is, I can't be called on.  I was called on last week and didn't do the reading.  I looked like a fool.  All eyes were on me for a few moments.  And every day since then I half-assed the reading, hoping that if I got called on, by a stroke of luck I'd wiz through it and that would be it.  The semester is almost over, and I am but one of a handful of people left to be called.  I am scared to death.

Why can I not focus on my work?  Why is it so hard to just read the forty eight pages for Federal Income Taxation?  It's not like the material is that hard.  Last year it would have even interested me.  But now I feel what they call 2L burnout.  The mounting stress of having no summer job prospects ahead of me.  The mounting stress of soul crumbling debt.  It's all sometimes too much for me to bear.

I could keep chugging along, hoping and praying that I get some good job.  Sadly, I have been reading what people are saying: the market is bleak, the job prospects are awful.  During 1L I didn't believe them.  Now I'm in my second year, with a little experience under my belt, and I am starting to see that there is indeed trouble brewing.  But what alternatives do I have?  A worthless undergraduate degree?  Like that will secure me a job!  Ha!  And I'm already sunk deep in graduate school debt.  It's either finish this up and have a graduate degree, or find a job in this depressed economy with loan payments coming due.

I try to not blame the system for the wrongs that are my fault.  I should have took people more seriously when they said "don't go to law school unless you are going to the top 25 schools," or "get a degree in engineering or in science."  Yes, it is indeed my own fault for not doing those things.  I look around my class room now, as I type, while my professor talks about deductions.  People are on Facebook or buying crap for their dorms, and I can't help but wonder "are they scared too, or is this just a joke to them?"  I see the people on the law review in the library, with their big smiles talking about their future plans.  "I'm going to Hawaii for Christmas," one girl spouts.  I feel jealousy.  I know I won't be going there anytime soon.  I hope and pray I find a job that will allow me to pay for a trip to Hawaii within the next five years.  I wonder if I got a degree in engineering if I would be on my way to some tropical locale right now?

I have friends who went to college for computer science.  I used to think that was a fad that would end when the bubble burst.  How wrong I was.  One friend is making well over $100,000 and the other, well, he's not too far behind.  Both younger than me.  Both just getting married.  Wow, must be nice.  What's a good law school pick up line?  "Hey baby, I almost made law review?"  I doubt that will go over too well.  Most non-law school students have no clue what law review is.  It's actually quite amazing how little non-law school students know about the law.  And then again, it's pretty amazing how happy many of them seem to be to not know it.  I won't be able to say I will know too much about deductions.  Maybe it won't be on the test.  Maybe I won't be called on.  Who knows.  Maybe this blog will be therapeutic to me.  Maybe it will at least give me something to focus on instead of going to Facebook or spending my loan money to spruce up my dorm.