I saw an interesting post on http://butidideverythingrightorsoithought.blogspot.com/:
The University of Georgia students have opened a food pantry. Don't believe me? Look!
http://www.npr.org/2011/10/20/141563700/university-of-georgia-students-open-food-pantry
Well, not to steal the other blog's thunder, but that reminded me of the predicament that I am in (you know, because I may have forgot). I am a law student, but not a rich one. I'm actually collecting food stamps as I go to law school. Why? Because I am poor. Many of my fellow students are wealthy, but I suppose not all are. I feel very out of place in those halls. In those classrooms. When I went a year ago I had this hope that I would be very wealthy one day, not have to rely on the government to feed me. Those dreams are dying though. Those days are almost gone.
I posted a letter from my grandparents a while back about how I should not lose sight of the dream, how I should never give up. They are still trying to get me to continue law school, and I have not replied back to them. I feel bad, but really don't know what to say. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to think about it. I have all this pressure riding on me to do well. My family honestly believes that I am going to be a rich lawyer. The reality is far from that. One day they will see that I am not (my grandparents might be dead by that time - so that may not matter).
On my facebook, which was deactivated shortly after this was posted: "oh (name) it is good to see you here again. Please don't let ever let your dreams die, you have come so far..... Don't know if you got my last letter but I hope you did. Please write me back, as always, I love hearing from you."
However, the rest of my family will be bewildered. They will say that I did something wrong. And you know what? I don't care. What do I care about, however, is that I was stupid enough to start. I didn't sit down and research it. I went into it balls out telling myself that it would save me and make me wealthy. When you are rock bottom you have delusions of grandeur. I can't stand hearing some of the people at my school, the 2Ls, talking about their bright futures. Are they lying to themselves? How can they be so smug? How can they smile? They have to know what hell it will be coming from a 2nd tier school. They are up against lawyers from tip top schools with a crapton of experience and connections. How can they expect to find a job? How can they have that silly grin on their face?
I don't know what I am going to tell my grandparents. I don't think I will say anything. I think that, honestly, once I find a way out, once I can survive on my own without these loans paying my rent, I am going to flee. I have not studied for my finals, which are in a few days. I don't care to. I know that I can't get anywhere near the top half of my class this semester. Why try? I just hope to pass. I tell myself that I can do better next semester. But does it matter? All the good ships have sailed and I am left with the crappy ones that are posted on http://www.shitlawjobs.com/. And I am going to have to fight, bone, tooth and nail for those jobs.
But as I mentioned to someone the other day: I do not plan on taking the bar. I will probably tell employers I started law school but did not finish, or I will go teach English outside the US, or I will do something else completely. There's a ton of non-law options. However, I blew a couple years of my life so far on this, and that angers me. However, I guess the best thing I can do now is to see it as a learning experience. A very expensive learning experience, but one none the less.
------
This blog is the blog of a law student going to a second tier rated university in the Northeast. He is a tired student, who has been in college way too long. He has almost no real world work experience. He has come from a poor family. He once had big dreams for his life, but as he gets older he sees those dreams die. Such is life. It's a hard lesson, but one that must be learned.
One last dream for our writer: to escape law school.
The University of Georgia students have opened a food pantry. Don't believe me? Look!
http://www.npr.org/2011/10/20/141563700/university-of-georgia-students-open-food-pantry
Well, not to steal the other blog's thunder, but that reminded me of the predicament that I am in (you know, because I may have forgot). I am a law student, but not a rich one. I'm actually collecting food stamps as I go to law school. Why? Because I am poor. Many of my fellow students are wealthy, but I suppose not all are. I feel very out of place in those halls. In those classrooms. When I went a year ago I had this hope that I would be very wealthy one day, not have to rely on the government to feed me. Those dreams are dying though. Those days are almost gone.
I posted a letter from my grandparents a while back about how I should not lose sight of the dream, how I should never give up. They are still trying to get me to continue law school, and I have not replied back to them. I feel bad, but really don't know what to say. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to think about it. I have all this pressure riding on me to do well. My family honestly believes that I am going to be a rich lawyer. The reality is far from that. One day they will see that I am not (my grandparents might be dead by that time - so that may not matter).
On my facebook, which was deactivated shortly after this was posted: "oh (name) it is good to see you here again. Please don't let ever let your dreams die, you have come so far..... Don't know if you got my last letter but I hope you did. Please write me back, as always, I love hearing from you."
However, the rest of my family will be bewildered. They will say that I did something wrong. And you know what? I don't care. What do I care about, however, is that I was stupid enough to start. I didn't sit down and research it. I went into it balls out telling myself that it would save me and make me wealthy. When you are rock bottom you have delusions of grandeur. I can't stand hearing some of the people at my school, the 2Ls, talking about their bright futures. Are they lying to themselves? How can they be so smug? How can they smile? They have to know what hell it will be coming from a 2nd tier school. They are up against lawyers from tip top schools with a crapton of experience and connections. How can they expect to find a job? How can they have that silly grin on their face?
I don't know what I am going to tell my grandparents. I don't think I will say anything. I think that, honestly, once I find a way out, once I can survive on my own without these loans paying my rent, I am going to flee. I have not studied for my finals, which are in a few days. I don't care to. I know that I can't get anywhere near the top half of my class this semester. Why try? I just hope to pass. I tell myself that I can do better next semester. But does it matter? All the good ships have sailed and I am left with the crappy ones that are posted on http://www.shitlawjobs.com/. And I am going to have to fight, bone, tooth and nail for those jobs.
But as I mentioned to someone the other day: I do not plan on taking the bar. I will probably tell employers I started law school but did not finish, or I will go teach English outside the US, or I will do something else completely. There's a ton of non-law options. However, I blew a couple years of my life so far on this, and that angers me. However, I guess the best thing I can do now is to see it as a learning experience. A very expensive learning experience, but one none the less.
------
This blog is the blog of a law student going to a second tier rated university in the Northeast. He is a tired student, who has been in college way too long. He has almost no real world work experience. He has come from a poor family. He once had big dreams for his life, but as he gets older he sees those dreams die. Such is life. It's a hard lesson, but one that must be learned.
One last dream for our writer: to escape law school.
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