Why did I go to school for a profession that will make me wear something that I absolutely detest wearing? I don't like suits one bit. I never have. I would much rather wear a pair of jeans instead of those black/grey suit pants. I would rather have a loose fitting shirt than something clinging at my neck, choking me. Why, then did I go to law school?
The truth is, I may have forgot about the wearing of the suits. Many of the scam blogs state that there are very few law jobs going around, thus I may not have to wear the suit. I guess that would be something to tell myself if I can't find a law job. Maybe not getting a job wouldn't be so bad, because I would not have to walk around looking like a mentally challenged penguin.I sometimes wonder why, as humans, we have standards that make it more uncomfortable for us all. Why not, instead of wearing suits, allow blue jeans and t-shirts to be the business norm? Would the world as a whole really hurt? Perhaps something could be done to make 'business' blue jeans and t-shirts be a bit more classy looking. But, does it really look so bad in the first place? Maybe we could all go naked?
I once read a poem about footie pajamas and law. There was a line about a charcoal grey lawyer's suit and footie pajamas. Imagine, wearing footie pajamas to court. If I was on my way out as an attorney, I think I would do that. Show up at court in footie pajamas. Maybe if I get another internship, and I don't like it, I will do just that. In fact, everyone who sympathizes with the scam blogs should wear footie pajamas to class one day to show how they feel about out of control tuition prices and the enrollment of far too many students.
The truth is, I never liked footie pajamas much. I usually sleep in the nude, as clothing is too restricting. Of course, this may be too much information for most of my readers, but I thought I should just come out with it. I like comfort. Who doesn't, though? I mean, honestly, why do you want some cloth (other than a blanket to keep warm) wrapping around you and choking you while you sleep?
Law may be one of the most uncomfortable professions. Law school, while not as bad as some say, is not as easy as many 'lay people' think (although some lay people probably find it to be harder than it really is). It's not the reading and the writing that is hard. Instead it is the mental aspect that can drive some people crazy. For example, being called on when you don't expect it. Having to recite a case in front of the whole class is something I do not enjoy. I never liked being the center of attention, so you can imagine how I feel when I am put on the spot. Further, hearing about how some are seeming to succeed while you feel like a failure. Add to that the curve and the fact that some people get on law review and flaunt it. Further, the countdown until graduation when it's either get a job or get packing. Sadly, I don't have much of a choice with that matter, as moving in with my parents is not an option after law school. So, if I don't find work, and any work, I would probably be living at some kind of homeless shelter on the outskirts of town (either that or being a hobo, riding the rails into the sunset).
Life as a hobo may not be so bad. Think about it. Seeing the country pass you by from a box car. Sure, there are other hobos, some crazy. And then there the stories of gangs that kill the homeless. But, imagine that kind of freedom. Of course, being somewhat obsessed with cleanliness would make that kind of life hard. Imagine, cooking dinner out under the stars in a small pan. The wind rustling through the trees as the moon rises high above. The sounds of the few wild animals that are still left. The coyotes howling through the night as you lie down for a short sleep. The four o' clock train will be through this part in only a few hours, then it's onward to Omaha. I hear there's some good chances for practicing law out in Nebraska. I wonder if anyone would hire me with a full beard down to my chest covered in grass. Of course, my clothing smells awful and my breath is worse.
"Hello, I was wondering if you were hiring lawyers? I got a JD from a fine institution. It's in my bag here somewhere."
"Get the hell out of here!"
"I'm serious sir. Now, where did I put it?"
"I'm calling Sheriff John Barker."
"Wait now, no need to call the police. I have that degree, it's just in my back pouch. I think I might have spilled beans on them though. That can that I pilfered from a dumpster back in Chicago was kinda leaky."
"I said get out of here now or you'll be going to... well I'll be a son of... you do have a degree, and from a higher ranked school than I went to."
"Yeah, told you so. Hirin'?"
Who knows, maybe being a hobo would be the ticket for a while. It would beat living with and leeching off my parents (which I already told you was not an option for me). Further, it would be better than sitting in a homeless shelter, sitting in line for food stamps and other aid, spending my day bound up in the bureaucracy that consumes those places.
I wonder if the lawyers wear suits in those rural areas? Maybe they wear blue jeans and cowboy boots to court, and the judge wears a ten gallon hat? I wonder if they would hire a hobo fresh from a train with a JD in his backpack? Do you think they would? It's an interesting thought.
