I am proud to say that I am the very first in my family not only to go to college, but also to go to law school. That being said, my family has no clue what law school is like or what the legal profession is really like. Recently I talked to a family member who said that I was probably going to be "set for life." I did not know what to say to this, as I expect utter hell ahead of me to find a job - and I have little to no hope of success. I have also considered joining the military, teaching English outside of the US, or leaving the US upon graduating for other work as other options. I fully expect to have to settle for one of these options. After all, who am I, a bottom of the class law student in a lower tier law school, with very little work experience and no connections, to expect something better? I have also prepared myself for work at Starbucks or in Fast Food, as I at least have experience with that sort of thing, and while I hated it, one has to do what one has to do to survive. I have resigned myself to the idea that I will never own my own home or partake in any such large purchase using credit.
Being the first in my family to go to college and law school, I have realized that I am the guinea pig. When I started my undergraduate 'career' I took out much loan money. I did not live at home, nor did I consider that a viable option at the time due to issues that were taking place at home during that time in my life. As such, I incurred much extra debt to cover rent. At the time I lived in Seattle, WA shortly after the wake of the 9/11 attacks. The airline industry, which is huge in Seattle, was severely hurt due to the attacks. Boeing and other large companies had laid off many workers, making the unemployment in Seattle and Washington state skyrocket. Finding a job at that time was quite hard, so I did school instead of finding a job. Sometimes I sit back, and think, to the sounds of NIN or Rancid blasting loudly on speakers behind me, what would have life been like if I had went to work instead of school?
I moved out of state and transferred schools to finish my undergraduate degree. After that I moved to the east coast for law school as I was not accepted to any of the west coast schools I applied at. I am sure this is quite common, as I know of a lot of TTTT and TTT students on the east coast from places such as California, Washington, Oregon, etc.
As I have gone through college and know the reality of the college 'experience' and the 'real job market' that exists after college, I could help my own children with the whole college experience. Problem, I do not plan on having children (never felt the want to) and I don't think I would have any with such debt even if I wanted some (which, again, I don't). Therefore, even though I have served as the Guinea pig, I will not have any children of my own to tell about the results of this experiment. Therefore, I am a wasted experiment in many ways.
Yesterday I was told a niece of mine is gearing up to go to college. She lives on the west coast and I don't talk to her, except when visiting (once every couple years, maybe). She is from a lower income family and her mother has done a couple years of college, but never finished. Like me at one optimistic time, my niece probably imagines that college will lead to wealth. Her boyfriend comes from a family that is, according to her mother, 'well off'. Of course, the boyfriend's parents are boomers who succeeded partly due to college. Surely these boomers paid little for their educations and are reaping the rewards. If my niece goes to college, surely she will end up 'well off' just like them, right?
I imagine she will one day have children of her own, and one day can be the Guinea pig of her family, telling them about her college experience and the results of it. Who knows, maybe my niece will find success. Maybe she will win the college lottery. I hope she does. Since her mother has some college experience, I am sure she can benefit from learning about not taking out loans and living at home. After all, I was informed that she does not want to talk out loans at the outset. That's great. I wish I knew not to back then.
I will graduate law school with around $200,000 in loans. I do not share this tid bit often as it's somewhat disheartening to think about. However, at the same time, I know my situation, and I know that even if I make $100,000 I will not be able to buy a house for a few years. I know, however, that I will not make this kind of money out of law school. People at my school who think they can make this much, and who are not in the top 1-2% of the class or who are not well connected are fools. There is no nice way to put it. It's the honest truth.
However, that being said, they too, in a way, are Guinea pigs. They will eventually realize the absolute hell that is before them. They will have the sleepless nights, the fear of the reoccurring nightmares of law school, and the unending lament of having went to law school in the first place. Many will break. Some will kill themselves (oh yes, they will). Others may end up in prison, which, may not be a bad alternative, as there is no debt and job search in there to worry about (sore rears, that's another story). Others will flee the country, feeling the shame of not being able to have paid back their debt. Having left the US on a few occasions, the idea of leaving the country does not bother me. However, what does bother me is not having a choice. What bothers me is having WASTED years on getting a worthless education. I have learned a lot through college, but I could have learned it all on my own without paying $200,000.
What a waste...
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