Law School Attitudes

There are many attitudes regarding the law school system.  They range from the attitudes of the scam bloggers, who tend to be angry at the system which pooped them out with less than they entered with.  Big debt and little job prospects are the issues that the scambloggers seem to take.  Further issues include a total disregard for economic principles by a system known as the ABA.

There are some who love the law school system.  The deans and many of the professors (but not all) seem to really enjoy it.  And why would they not?  It seems like an easy enough job.  Maybe not as easy as some say.  However, to be paid $100-200k a year, and sometimes more, to teach a few classes and correct some essays once a semester doesn't seem like a bad gig.  To be honest, I'd take it. 

Then there are the lethargic students who I come in contact with.  They are very quiet about a lot of things, so I can't really gauge what they are thinking.  Many seem to not know about the real job market, although many are scared.  However, few are at the point as another scamblogger, JDPainterGuy, where they wish they never went to law school in the first place.

Some individuals are very depressed.  They are at the point of suicidal thoughts and thinking that their life will never be the same again.  One individual posted a comment on another law school blog relating to a plumber friend he knew that made an exceptional amount of money. 

Times have changed. I would trade my degrees to be able to have a job where I know things will get better, where I know I will not be replaced by a slave from the third world, and where I know that some political force would intervene on my behalf when things looked bleak. I would do this even if it meant working physically hard.

There are worse things in life than working with your hands, and when I finally decide to blow my brains out to end my mental anguish, I will have been living proof of it.

This is where I do not want to be.  However, at the same time, I understand that it is very hard to not feel down sometimes when you expected life to turn out a lot differently.  Many of the lethargic students at the law school where I attend will probably one day feel this way.  They still have expectations of law being a glamorous and wealth creating profession for anyone who can get a 148 on the LSAT. 



Many of these students have not looked at a 'scamblog' nor have they really got to see the life of a lawyer after law school.  Before I enrolled I had no idea what a lawyer did (other than what I saw from a couple episodes of Perry Mason.  Plus, Captain Picard in Star Trek the Next Generation does a bit of lawyering in a couple of the episodes).  Sadly, the big feeder web forum for law students, Top-Law-Schools, will stop at nothing to block links to scamblogs.  Nando's opus, ThirdTierReality has been redubbed "T14 Paradise".  If anything, it is a tyrannical mockery of the intelligence of a breed of people who has been told over and over that they are some of society's smartest individuals (a point that I seriously question -- many law students I have come in contact with show no more intelligence than many undergrads).  If anything, TLS (the dungheap of the law world) is doing their students an injustice by not allowing them to see alternative facts and make up their own still-developing and often childlike minds. 

I think that there is some importance to the power of positive thinking.  I think that telling yourself day after day that your life is worthless is not the right path to take.  Just because you did not do well in the legal field after believing you would does not make you a bad person.  There is still much that a person can do to better themselves and live a great life.  Although you may not make $160,000 a year in law, nor do you have any connections, you can still contribute something to the world.  I am saddened when I see a person state that they want to off themselves because of law school.  While three years and $200-300k is a lot of money, a life is worth much more.  I would propose taking some time out of your day and forgetting about law school and asking yourself what you want to do with the remainder of your life.  It is hard with student loans and debt, but nobody can take your life from you.  Why would you take it away from yourself?

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By the way, for some reason this blog was not allowing comments.  It now allows comments from anyone (anonymous included), so if you want to say something, feel free. 

Coming to terms with it all...

The last year has been an emotional roller coaster for me.  My first semester of 2L ended with me receiving horrendous grades.  I battled my way through emotions of "why try", "can I even get an A any more?" "have other law students got better?"  I lamented, missing a good chunk of classes in the last semester, going above the allowed absences in a few of my courses.  Then, I decided to cram at the end, spending hours upon hours on outlines, thinking that maybe there was a chance of me doing decent.  Better than C's.  Maybe I could get average grades.  In the end, I was able to pull in a few decent grades, while at the same time thinking that I may never even practice law.

Further, I battled depression knowing that I would probably never get the coveted $100k+ job or the summer internship that supposedly pays $20k.  I laid in bed at night, staring at the ceiling, realizing that I was paying over $150,000 for the privilege of going to law school.  How long would it take me to pay this sum back?  I did great in my law and economics course, and with my understandings of economics, I should have known better. The truth is, I didn't listen to reason.  I just jumped in to law school because for years I told myself I wanted to do it.  After three years of applying to schools I should have bit the bullet and gave up, but instead, I told myself it was so important to get into law school.  I knew little to nothing about the state of the legal economy when I was accepted, but even if I did, it would have been too little too late.  I was devoted to my goal of getting into law school, no matter what the tier, no matter what the cost.  I would have went to Harvard or Cooley, as long as it was an ABA accredited law school.

This summer has given me a lot of time to think.  Actually, the whole year, in all its craziness, has allowed me to come to terms that I will probably not be pulling in $100k+ a year in law.  Further, I have come to the conclusion that I do not want that any longer.  The time spent surrounded by the walls of a firm, the low man on the totem pole, the over-worked and undersexed partner breathing down your back.  No thanks.  I don't want to end my day to just go home to a fancy house that I get little time to enjoy, in a car that I only sees the road between home and the firm.  Even $100k a year is too little when it's my youth that is on the line.  No thanks.

So what is it that I want?  I don't know, now.  Do I want to practice law?  I don't think so.  Will I take the bar?  Yes.  I will still complete the goal I went after.  I am too close to quit and I feel that in the end this was an expensive way for me to prove that I can attain my goal.  I am still young and I still have many options in life ahead of me.  Law, however, may not be in the cards for me.

A+ in Law and Economics: and I don't care anymore.

This morning, for about half a second, I felt good that I got an A+ in my law and economics course, but then I realized: I do not care anymore.  This semester has gone by better than last, although I got a lackluster C+ in my Corporate Finance.  I was lucky to score a B+ in EU Law, which was kind of a fluke.  Hell, it all was.

LISTEN CHILDREN:  Law school grades are mostly random.  You can get a C+ in a class you put way more effort in than a class you got an A-.  I worked my butt off in my Corporate Finance and missed most of my law and economics course.  I am not smart.  An A+ does not mean you are smart.  Even if you end up getting an award, you are probably at least half lucky.

If you think you are lucky enough to 'score' your way through law school, you might want to take out maximum loans on law school and play the lottery, because you probably have a better chance of winning the lottery than doing so good in law school that you end up with an amazing job.  And if you don't believe me, why not take a look at a few of the other blogs that are featured to the right?

One more year of this madness (not going to bother doing internships this summer -- in fact, I had two phone interviews the other day for internships -- and I didn't bother even answering.  Just wasn't in the mood).  I figure that the odds of me practicing law (and actually liking it) are about as slim as me making love to a pack of blue wolves with wings in the Himalayas next Thursday.

IT.  WILL.  NOT.  EVER.  HAPPEN.

Student Loan Debt | Law School Suicide?

I have read that suicide in the law profession is one of the highest amongst all professions.  I am no lawyer yet, nor do I know if I ever will be one.  However, I must say that as of late, the thoughts of suicide have come into my mind.  Late at night, lingering in my mind.  Consuming my thoughts.  Penetrating my psyche.

First, I don't think of myself as a suicide risk.  I have played with the idea years ago of ending my life, but now I have things in my life that are too precious to kill myself for.  My family, my pets, my friends, my World of Warcraft account with a level 85 Restoration Druid, Warlock, 2 Mages, and a Priest.  The Warlock alone probably makes my life worth keeping around, as I have gotten immense pleasure off leveling him.  For the Horde!

When I was very young, around 18ish, I once played around in a chat room, depressed out of my mind about a girl that I thought I loved who dumped me.  I told the chat room that I would kill myself!  Later that night the police came by to check up on me.  I told them that I was not going to kill myself.  It seems that some woman in that chat room called the cops on me.  That's when I realized that it was not good to even talk about suicide.  No one in my family ever found out about this dark event.

For the last few nights I have found myself awake late into the night, depressed out of my mind.   I have read things on these scam blogs that people in society do not understand.  I started college a few years ago hoping that I would one day make a decent living.  I thought I would be happy with around $50,000 a year.  In fact, coming from a very poor background, that seemed like a huge amount of money to me.  As I graduated with a bachelor's degree, I realized I would be happy with $30,000, but the chances of me getting it seemed nil.  So, I went on to law school, figuring I could make at least that amount and have a "respectable" career.  Now, it turns out, that dream was not really viable.  In fact, while I may find a job that pays decently, chances are I won't.  It's not a good bet.  And not one that should be taken lightly.  It's a losers game. 


Anyway, late in the night, while staring up at the ceiling, trying to focus my mind on something besides law school I found myself playing with the idea of offing myself.  I realized that this was not something I should be thinking about, as I have much to live for, and it made me feel even worse.  How could I have gotten to this point?  How could I, during 1L, have had so much hope for the future, and now, being a 2L, feel that it's all a waste?  It's all dismal.  It's not worth it.  I feel that I am going to, in the end, only have debt to show for my accomplishments.  I feel in the end, all I will be remembered for is that guy in the family who got so much education but had so much debt and never could find a real job.  It's a sobering and depressing thought, and perhaps my greatest challenge-greater than the torts final and corporations final, and taxation final will be learning to live with the fact.  The fact that I am doomed to failure.  The fact that I really had no chance at all. 

I made a mistake.  And a costly one.  One that will surely haunt me for the remainder of my life.  Keep this in mind, 0L's, as you begin your education.  Think about taking a couple years off, trying to find a decent job, and forgetting about law school until some changes are made.  You have all your lives to go to law school.  It will be around in a decade.  Until then, get some good experience in the real world, and try your hand at paying back that undergraduate debt.  Chances are you will realize that you were better off not going to law school.  Chances are you will find something more valuable than learning the coveted black letter law.  Your time, dear reader, is better spent than learning how to brief a one hundred year old case.

Law School: The Best Remaining 3 Years of Our Lives.

 
Today I was thinking that law school may be the best three years we have left.  The days are sometimes long and painfully boring.  There is much worry regarding finding a job or not finding a job.  And, some of us are so devoted to school that we have no lives outside of the walls of higher learning.  However, what lurks in the future makes for a sobering reality.  Law school may be some of the best days we have left.

Law school can be depressing...

What comes after graduation?  Depression over not finding a job?  Desperately faxing hundreds, perhaps thousands, of resumes to employers who snort upon opening them, discarding them in the trash in a frenzy?  Explaining to family that law school doesn't equal success.  Explaining to non-legal employers that our law degree was merely a setback?  Explaining to the pastor that the reason I cussed during church was because that job I interviewed for three weeks ago was a no go?  Explaining to the dog that I can not afford to feed him, so he is going to have to go get his own dinner outside tonight?  Explaining to the roaches in the apartment that I can't afford to kill them?  Explaining to a would be girlfriend that I can't afford to take her out on a dinner date, but the food stamps that my career services office helped me procure afforded me some very delicious T.V. Dinners.  Explaining to the bus driver that I will swipe my bus pass twice after getting the job in which I am going to interview for to make up for not having a valid one this time.  You get the point...

Another thing to keep in mind is that there's no summer vacation or spring break (which is coming up next week) in the real world.  A law student is wise to cherish every moment of that spring break (some actually study during it), as it will be one of the last large breaks one will have for a while (other than the unemployment break, but unlike spring break, we don't really look forward to that one). 

Today I heard laughter coming from the table behind me and I wondered what could make the person seem so jolly.  Was it that she got a job offer from a big firm?  Was her law review article published the closest to the front of the Journal of International Law?  Did her boyfriend buy her a brand new puppy?  Laughter, while common now, will grow to be less common as the years progress.  Laughter, to a graduated lawer, is something that begins to die out, go extinct, and even outlawed.  They say after taking the bar exam, all laughter is cut in half.  After finding your first job, it is hard to even smile. 

In one of my classes today we were asked about the time value of money.  The professor asked how much we would value $100 in a year from now.  One person said $106, another said $110, and another said $200.  The professor asked the student who said $200 how much he would view $100 in three years from now.  The student said $250.  The professor said, "why not $300?"  The student said, "I am a 2L and next year I will be a 3L, and I will have a job so the delay in getting the money will not matter to me as I will be making a lot of money."  Enjoy it while it lasts.