You shoulda been a.... Plumber!

Welcome to my first post ever in a new series entitled: You shoulda been a...  In this series, I will be outlining career paths you probably never thought of as visions of prestige blossomed in that brain of yours.

When people speak of prestigious careers, two do not come to mind.  The first is street sweeper/garbage man, and the second is plumber.  But there's nothing prestigious about six figure debt, and the truth is, being a plumber can provide you with a sweet life.

A plumber is a tradesperson who specializes in installing and maintaining systems used for potable (drinking) water, sewage, and drainage in plumbing systems. The term dates from ancient times, and is related to the Latin word for lead, "plumbum." (wikipedia)

Now, not everything is great about the life of a plumber.  I have a family member who is a plumber, and while he's not a billionaire, he certainly makes more than many of my readers who have fancy TT, TTT, TTTT, T, and T14, T6, etc. degrees.  There's a lot of T's in law, but how many T's are in the world Plumber?

None

First piece of career advice: if the profession has a lot of T's in it, run away.  Lucky for you, plumber has zero T's in it, and there's always going to be the need for a lot of plumbers.  Unlike law, plumbers are needed by almost every individual that poops in water.  That's because toilets, sinks, and pipes break down sometimes.  Also, when BigLaw associates need homes built, they will need some sort of piping, and when those pipes clog with backdoor ruffage, it's going to be the plumbers that will come to the rescue.

Further, unlike law school, the cost of being a plumber is low.  Plumbers can learn under another plumber.  There is no three years of plumbing school where one must pay $45k or more a year just to get in.  There's no high opportunity cost of learning plumbing.  In fact, while one learns, one can have a part time job on the side.  Think for a moment, actually earning while learning! 

A job you can take anywhere

Say you want to learn international law.  Do you really think you'll get a job at the UN or in France?  Do you see yourself practicing a multi country legal case in Thailand?  Do you have visions of being taxied around Hong Kong before heading back to the US?  I did!  However, if I was told that this can be a reality in plumbing, I would have blushed.  The truth is, every country has toilets, and those toilets need to be kept in working order.

While you may never work in the UN as a law student, plumbers are routinely called into buildings like the UN, the White House, and other famous places.  If you want to fix a stopped up sink in Bali, whose gonna stop you?  The ABA?!  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Plumbing is truly a job that you can take anywhere with you!  And it pays well to boot!

How much money does a plumber make?Like all jobs, it depends.  Some plumbers do well, and others don't.  Many hang up a shingle and find work that way.  Many companies want plumbers.  Good plumbers who are willing to get their arms brown. Are you willing to get your arms brown, or do you just want to get your nose brown at a big firm?  Huh?  Something to think about.

But what about fame and prestige?  Plumbers are not known the world over like big time lawyers!Oh really?  You never heard of this guy? 



But I want to help others, so I should be a lawyer, because then I can help other people.
I forgot that appearing at someone's home at 1:32 AM and unclogging their flooding toilet (if you so choose) isn't considered helping them out.  Silly me.  I guess you can only help another person if you are a lawyer.  I forgot that being a lawyer was a prerequisite (a word many can not actually pronounce) to being a helpful individual.  I guess then you should not be a plumber if you are worried about not being able to help a family in need (/sarcasm).
In conclusion, consider plumbing!

The Law School Avengers

Law school is a scary place.  It all begins with the LSAT.  Actually, it all begins the first time you sit down and watch Perry Mason and realize that you want to be a lawyer.  It begins when you are sitting there with your family in front of the screen and Judge Judy is screaming at some person for not being as smart as she, a New York Law School grad, is.  And you figure, if a NYLS grad like Judge Judy can make $45 million a year, why can't you?

So, you are gearing up for law school, mouth foaming as you sit there in a big room full of LSAT takers, and you know that once you get those scores back you will be strolling into an amazing law school and beginning your career as a lawyer.

Well, somewhere a few other individuals are gearing up for law school.  They are considered some of the finest people to have ever walked the Earth.  Nobody told them the difference between a tier 1 and a tier 4 school, and frankly, they don't seem to care.  They just want to graduate and practice law. 

They are known as: The Law School Avengers

Iron Man




Tony Stark had a STEM degree and a big science background which lead him to believe he would do well in IP law.  He started his first year paying close attention to the cases and taking good notes.  In fact, many were jealous of his laptop, which was the finest in the class.  He'd always sandwich himself in between two hot women on the first day (you know, when the professors make you write down where you will be sitting for the whole year). 

Tony was quite the gunner, always raising his hand and speaking when he had the chance.  In fact, everyone just knew that Mr. Stark would walk away with all the big awards and the highest class rank.  When Tony Stark explained the science behind the Hairy Hand Case (Hawkins v. McGee), everyone, including the professor, was all ears. 

But something happened.  Exam day came and everyone pulled out their calculators for the Contracts exam.  Tony suited up right there in front of the proctor, whose mouth hung open.  The proctor began furiously pointing at the board, which said "no outside materials except for laptop, calculator, and scratch paper."  Tony was forced, to his dismay, to remove his Iron Man suit.  Since his only calculator was built into the suit, Tony Stark ended 1L with the lowest grade in Contracts.

Everyone thought this gunner would be on the top of the class, but instead he walked out of 1L with an almost failing GPA and would have to take Contracts again.  Instead of doing that, Tony dropped out of law school and fell back on the STEM degree he had earned earlier.  Oh, and the multi-billion dollar defense company he owned didn't hurt either.

Captain America



Captain Steve Rogers had one thing in mind when he started law school.  That was justice.  He was the type who always said he wanted to be a lawyer to help those in need.  He didn't care about BigLaw or big money.  Further, as a military man, he figured he would get in on JAG if things didn't pan out.  He also was aware of the loan repayment option for public interest law that his law school offered.  He would need it, as he got no institutional grant money or aid of any type.

Let's back up a moment, shall we?  You see, Captain America had practiced hard for the LSAT.  He took the practice exams and eventually scored a 177 on one of these practice exams.  He was feeling good about himself.  In fact, he was preparing to go to one of the finest public interest law schools in the land, CUNY law.  However, when Captain America begin the LSAT, he found himself falling into a deep cryogenic sleep.  He was awoken at the end of the LSAT and forced to hand in his blank scan tron.  Since he got a 120, he was forced to attend Cooley Law School, who took him mostly on account of his strong military background.

Captain America got alright grades at Cooley and was liked by his professors as well as the dean as being the kind of guy who follows the rules and doesn't talk back.  In fact, when the Cooley sign fell off the Lansing Lugnuts Stadium, it was Captain America who volunteered to hang it back up.

Spiderman



Spiderman, like Tony Stark, had a science background which he figured he would fall back on.  However, since his uncle's death, young Peter Parker figured he would use law school as a way to get jerks like the man who murdered his uncle put behind bars, and sue the Daily Bugle for defamation.

To Spiderman's dismay, he found that he was paying more money in law school than he would get in any defamation suit against the Bugle.  He took out many loans, but since he was going to a lower T1 school part time, he got some good aid on the side (mostly as a result of going to Columbia for undergrad). 

Spiderman's fate came whenever he would try to study.  He found that his girlfriend wanted all of his time and attention, and whenever he tried to open one of his law books, he found that his webbing always made the pages stick shut.  Spiderman eventually decided he should just drop out after reading JDpainterguy's blog. 

The Hulk


They still talk about the hulk in the halls of the law school he attended.  Dr. Bruce Banner was always a quiet type.  He sat in the back row and always took the most meticulous notes.  He used a note taking program that Tony Stark let him use.  One day, in his 2L class, the international law professor was going over the case The Paquete Habana.  Dr. Banner enjoyed this case thoroughly (many seem to enjoy this one, for some strange reason) and was hoping he would be called on to tell it to the class.  However, he was not.  Instead of paying attention as normal (what more could he learned by paying attention to this case?), he began searching the internet.  Somehow Dr. Bruce Banner found a link to one of the scam blogs and started reading through it.  Realizing that he was now a 2L and in deep debt, and further realizing the job outlook for graduates of his school, Dr. Bruce Banner started to rage. 

The professor looked up, after telling his own anecdote about being aboard a Navy ship at Fleet Week, and noticed the Hulk running through desks right at him.  The hulk picked up the professor by the throat and demanded to see the Valvoline Dean.  

The rest is history, and the Hulk actually had to serve a short jail sentence, which would have probably made it so he could never pass the character and fitness portion of the bar exam.  It's a shame too, because up until then, Bruce Banner was #1 in his class and on law review.

Thor



Thor didn't really care about law school, but was connected (his father was a partner at a big law firm), so he figured he might as well go to whatever school would take him. 

Thor was somewhat cocky and did not pay much attention in class.  He found right away that he had no taste whatsoever for the females of law school and it made him feel somewhat depressed.  At first he thought it was his school's fault and planned on getting top 10% grades and transfering.  However, right away Thor knew that he would not get the grades needed to move up to top schools like Fordham or University of Oregon.  So, he sat back and drifted aimlessly through law school.

Thor was famous for always missing the exact number of classes allowed plus one.  For his first year he interned his his father's firm in Asgard, finding himself doing regular intern stuff like scrubing walls, watering plants, and plungering out toilets until the plumber arrived.  Thor knew that this would not last though, and eventually he would be next to his dad working hard on multi-planetary contracts and property issues. 

In Thor's third year he was told by his father that there would only be one position available at the firm and it was going to his brother Loki, who got into a much better law school (Georgetown University Law Center).  So Thor dropped out two weeks before finals and fell back on being the heir to the throne of Asgard (which was more prestigious and paid more than BigLaw).

Man of Industry

It was only a few months ago when I met this "man of industry".  I knew he'd be large in many things.  He walked out from my sister's house, greeting me with a grin.  This was not any house, mind you.  This was a home.  Sitting on the edge of a cliff surrounded by thousands upon thousands of pines, overlooking some of the most beautiful back country in Idaho, it commanded an awesome view. 

The man's eyes gazed on me.  It was the first time we met.  He had wedded my sister and was now gearing up to make his way to the Emerald City, a.k.a. Seattle.  And deep in the living room, with a baby suckling, was my sister.  She had a look of emptiness on her face.  She stared blankly at me when I walked in.  With this marvelous mansion surrounding her, I wondered how she could be anything but giddy.

The man of industry sat next to her.  His new son continued to drink from her as his father grinned at me.  This man was proud of his accomplishments.  Behind him windows that were four times as tall as he was took in the landscape.  He looked me up and down, as if I was a threat to him.  He smiled.  We spoke.

"How do you like it over there?" He asked, regarding my home in New York.
"I like it." 
He was amazed.  He hated it.  "I used to go there for business.  I hate it."
"I see."

His words were spoken quickly.  He knew what he liked in life.  He also knew what he did not like.  He was large, like the house he was in.  His woman, my sister, at his side, said little.  She was annoyed at my presence most likely.  We have never been close.

"What are you doing?"
"Law school."

He was not impressed.  Many laymen may be impressed when you tell them law school, but not this man.  By now, you are probably wondering what this man of industry does for a living.  He told me that he was buying this amazing house from a man who owned a helicopter company.  The company went under shortly after the crash of '08.  He was now unloading the house, and brother-in-law was going to take over everything. 

"What are your plans for life?" he asked.  This was where he was sizing me up.  He wanted to see what kind of threat I was. 

"I don't know.  Maybe start a business," I said, meekly.  It was right then that I realized that I had no plans or goals.  I was just sailing along.  Just in law school at the time, hoping to "do my best".  Hoping against all odds that I would find that amazing job and find that my worries were for naught.  Maybe the scam blogs will be wrong for me, I thought.  But this man slapped me back into reality when he asked me that question.  How can I expect to be different than the others?  Some of them went to T6 schools and they can't find jobs!  How can I expect to do better?  And look at this man's house!  It's huge!  And his child, his 9th!  Surely he is doing something right! (keep in mind, he was married once before)

"Why don't you have any children?" He asked.  I laughed inside.  Truthfully, I do not want children.  That is something that I am adamant about.  I have never had the desire to reproduce.  "I don't really want any."  Having nine children himself, he was perplexed.

"I love all my children," he said, looking down at his son.  "I would never do anything differently."
Of course not, I thought to myself.  You have it all.  He then leaned back and fell asleep as I sat there, staring at that view beyond.  The family dog came out and tugged at my pants and the other kids would be arriving home from school soon.  Sister was quiet for the most part, but eventually showed me the place.  We went into the basement and then to the loft.  I saw the bedroom where he had a massive bed all surrounded by toy trucks.  The bathtub was her "pride and joy" as she put it.  Outside on the deck was a hot tub.  The loft was where their office was. 



About an hour later we parted ways.  Surely now, you wonder what this man of industry does for a living.  It's not something that one may think.  He had no higher education whatsoever.  In fact, when my little cousin was talking about going to college, he told her college was stupid.  Just right out told her.  If there's one thing about this man of industry, it's that he's a straight talker.  In fact, he's just a regular ol' truck driver.  He hauls cars across the country for a living.  That's it!  No fancy office job, no MBA or PhD.  No JD.  Heck, I don't even know if he finished high school.  He sits behind the wheel of a big rig and claims to make well over $100k a year.  No student debt. 

Something for you all to think about.

Little Darcy Hookhands

Little Darcy Hookhands
Based on a true story

 

Darcy, like the rest of us, was excited about her first year of law school.  She sat in the second row, opposite of me, and watched the teacher intently.  Her arms were folded, sometimes in her lap, or sometimes her hands would rest on the table next to her Macbook Air.  The professors were all fond of Darcy, because she would only answer when she really knew the answer to a question.  Unlike many of the gunners, who longed to hear themselves speak, and who were often wrong, Darcy thought about the question, and often waited for others to speak before she would tell the professor the correct answer. 

The teachers perhaps pitied Darcy in a way, because of her predicament.  You see, when she would put her hands on the table in front of her, with her arms crossed, you could see that she had no hands.  Nobody asked her where they had gone to, or how they were lost.  Instead, she had two big shiny hooks for hands that gleamed under the light of that big classroom. 

I'll remember in property class we were speaking of animals.  We had just finished one of the most crazy cases on property dealing with animals, Pierson v. Post.  I remember that Darcy was called upon during this case.  Mesmerized by her, I sat intently, listening to her words.  I still remember exactly what she said to this day:

In order to obtain title to a ferae naturae (wild animal) a person must take it. The “first to kill and capture” is the superior rule of law. Had Post mortally wounded the animal, it would have been sufficient to show possession since this would have deprived the animal of its natural liberty. However, the plaintiff was only able to show pursuit and therefore acquired no property interest in the animal.

I could not help but notice that her voice was beautiful as she spoke.  She radiated confidence as she stated each word.  She grasped the case almost as well as the professor.  I could tell that he tried to challenge her, but to no avail.  However, what I remember most about that day, October 17th 2010, was when another classmate, let's call him Rod Thompson, raised his gunner hand, and proceeded to ask one of the most idiotic of questions.  "Can a person obtain title to another person if he captures it?"

The professor was obviously not impressed by the fact that this young man did not actually think before he sputtered his ridiculous question.  "What do you think?" the professor asked.

"I... I... Well, no, that would be slavery."

The professor then asked the class what they thought about it.  Most agreed that it would be slavery. 

A few months later I was chosen to explain another case to the class, this one dealing with lost property.  The case was Armory v. Delamirie.  Since the case was so short, I just read the whole thing.  It went like this:

Finder of a jewel may maintain trover.

The plaintiff being a chimney sweeper's boy found a jewel and carried it to the defendant's shop (who was a goldsmith) to know what it was, and delivered it into the hands of the apprentice, who under pretence of weighing it, took out the stones, and calling to the master to let him know it came to three halfpence, the master offered the boy the money, who refused to take it, and insisted to have the thing again; whereupon the apprentice delivered him back the socket without the stones. And now in trover against the master these points were ruled:

1. That the finder of a jewel, though he does not by such finding acquire an absolute property or ownership, yet he has such a property as will enable him to keep it against all but the rightful owner, and consequently may maintain trover.

2. That the action well lay against the master, who gives a credit to his apprentice, and is answerable for his neglect.

3. As to the value of the jewel several of the trade were examined to prove what a jewel of the finest water that would fit the socket would be worth; and the Chief Justice directed the jury, that unless the defendant did produce the jewel, and shew it not to be of the finest water, they should presume the strongest against him, and make the value of the best jewels the measure of their damages: which they accordingly did.

 I remember looking over at Darcy to see if she approved.  By this time I thought she was so smart.  I just knew that she would take the CALI award for property, and perhaps for the rest of the courses.  "Why did she not go to Yale, Stanford, or even Harvard?" I wondered.  Why was she here? 

The professor was not impressed by my reading the case verbatim, but it was correct and he could not scold me for being right.  "Indeed," he said, looking at me.  I could tell he was conjuring quite a challenge for me.  I remember thinking to myself: think logically like a vulcan.  Think logically like a vulcan. 

"Now, tell me, if you were to lay something down and leave the room, and if you were to return the next day, looking for that item, would it be lost, or would it be mislaid?"

I went blank.  What would Spock say?  I was terrified.  I never liked being called on in class.  I never liked being the center of attention.  I was sweating, and I realized that a vulcan would not worry about it, I had been called on, and I could not change that now.  Instead I should focus on the question.  Being right or wrong is irrelevant.  The point is getting through the class.  You are being challenged, and most of the challenge is in your mind. 

"I think it would be lost," I said.  Little Darcy smiled at me, and I knew I was right. 

But I was only half right.  "It could be either," the professor said, "it depends on other factors." 

This was the typical response to the law school game.  Often no matter what you say is right or wrong.  If I was to say "it could be either," I would have heard, "no, it was clearly lost."  I was done.  But Darcy wanted to speak, and up in the air went her shining hook hand.

"Yes," the professor said, smiling. 

"This is kind of a personal question," Darcy said, blushing.
"That is fine," the professor said.  Generally he did not care for personal questions.  The gunners would sometimes ask questions such as "my grandfather bought some property and there's a ton of mice loose in one of the barns.  Are those mice his or does the federal government have constructive possession over the mice?" in which the professor would respond, "well, we went over wild animals, and as the case law states, the animals are owned by nobody until they are captured or deprived of their natural liberty.  However, the government might try to claim ownership of some animals, but probably not mice in a barn."

Darcy continued.  "My hooks, if I was to lay them down and leave, would they be considered a part of me, or just a chattel?"

I wish I would have asked her to the barrister's ball, but I was too shy.  And I figured she had to be taken.  She never spoke of a significant other, but her emerald green eyes and her pouty red lips seemed out of my league.  I was too shy to ever approach her and speak with her.  I knew she could tell I liked her though.  I always watched her speak and always sent smiles her way.

The year eventually came to an end, and as such, so does my tale.  I remember us all sitting there in class while the professor went over last year's exam.  He was telling us what he was looking for and what he did not want to see on the exam.  I was nervous, as this would be the first exam I would be taking in law school.  I was excited as well, as property was my favorite class.  Further, I wanted to prove myself and do great on this test. 

I knew I would not see Darcy on test day.  She had a disability that was obvious.  And I knew that the professors allowed concessions to be made for those with disabilities.  I was told that one of those concessions was six hours to take a three hour exam.  I also heard a couple of the other people in class were taking advantage of that particular concession. 

Darcy is the girl in the blue, on the right side of the picture.

It was a cool day when I arrived at my school to take that exam.  I walked up to the room, with my books and laptop in hand (open book test).  I sat down and got myself ready.  I usually sat in the front of the room, but for test day I would sit in the back.  As I was getting myself ready, I noticed Darcy walk in and sit down.  She tried to open her laptop, but was unable to do it very well.  Usually the girl she sat next to would help her, but she had yet to arrive.  I watched as she tried to open it to no avail.  I decided to make my way down there and open it for her.  I didn't say anything, but she thanked me and smiled, looking up at me with those beautiful eyes of hers.  I smiled back, probably blushing.  I wanted to ask her why she was not taking the test with the added time.  I knew she wanted to be like everyone else though.  She did not want to be seen as disabled, but as a person who had surpassed the challenges of the setback she had been dealt in life.  I was impressed.

The test began.  I typed furiously.  The question was about wild animals.  Perhaps it was for Darcy that the professor wrote it.  I sometimes looked down to see Darcy trying to hit the keys with her hands.  I could hear the noise of her hooks hitting the keyboard, but I did not let it distract me.  I let nothing distract me.  As the hours passed, I looked down towards Darcy and saw that her screen was barely covered with text, and that the words seemed misspelled. 

I must have typed 10,000 words on that exam.  At least it felt like it.  When I was done, I left the room, not speaking to anyone about the exam.  I went home and prepared for my upcoming exams. 

Next spring I found out Darcy was in the bottom of the class and had took a leave of absence.  I never saw her again.

Telling My Date About My Student Loan Debt

So, I was able to go on my date.  It wasn't much, but it was sure a lot of fun (and something I truly needed)!  We walked around, went to an Indian restaurant, and went to the park and had ice cream.  We also went to Target to get some school supplies (her idea -- she likes to buy stuff early).  I got a few notebooks.  I don't use a laptop in class, I like the old pen and paper method.

We talked a little bit about school.  I told her that I am going to law school and I mentioned how expensive it was.  She mentioned that she had some debt herself and that she was not crazy about having to take out loans, but she felt she had no other option.  She didn't seem put off by the fact that I have over $150k in debt.  I was scared to death to tell her this.  However, I did feel bad saying it.  It's a lot harder to say it than it is to just think about it.

In the park, while eating ice cream, I asked if she had a good time.  She said yes and continued to eat.  I think that is a good sign.  I had a good time too.  I am a bit old fashioned, so we did not kiss on the first date.

I felt good about myself for not letting my status as an indentured member of the higher education world hold me back on my date.  I never know how a person will react when I tell them of my debt.  I remember a few years ago telling a coworker of mine that I had about $50k in loans.  I remember his little mouth falling open and him gasping "wow".  It was the first time I felt bad about it.

College Loan Debt as "Good Debt"

Recently I listened to JDPainter on NPR state that he thought college debt was good debt.  I always heard the same thing.  Financial books would always speak of "good debt" and "bad debt" and the college loans were always on the good side (credit card debt is the bad stuff).  However, it's starting to change to where college loans are seen as bad debt.  I think any debt that gets a person's jaw to drop is bad debt.

How to tell someone about your college loans.

Since I mentioned I told my date about my college loans, and survived, I wanted to post a blog entry about telling a friend or girlfriend/boyfriend about your college loan debt.  Telling someone else about college debt can be terrifying.  If that person is someone you find yourself wanting to be with, telling them about debt can be horrifying.  So, how does one tell another person about the massive loans they took out?

1.  Stay Cool.

First, you don't want to appear scared yourself about the debt.  If you are scared about your college loan debt, chances are you will scare the other person with them.  You will want to make them feel that you feel at least someone secure in the debt.  For example, you may say the following:

"I have a debt load from my education.  I just wanted to let you know.  It's about $185,678.22, give or take."

2.  Pick a good time.

Picking a good time to tell that other person about your debt is a great idea.  Imagine it like asking for their hand in marriage.  The situation has to be right.  For example, you would not want to ask that other person to marry you in Wal-Mart (or would you?).

You may want to consider a relaxed place, like a park or the beach.  Further, you could consider looking presentable.  Dressed up maybe?  Also, don't tell him/her if he/she is having a bad day.

3.  Show you are in control.

Showing the other person that you have control over the situation is important.  Mention that you are fully aware and committed to programs such as IBR and the like.  However, don't flat out lie.  Don't say, "my school pop's out grads who start at $75k min, but most of us are on track to make $160k."  Even if the schools said it to you, you don't want to spread that kind of information.  On the same token, don't say that you expect to be destitute and never able to pay back a dime.

4.  Turn it into a positive.

It's kind of crazy, but one can make that massive debt seem like a good thing.  How, you ask?  Well, you can state that it's your chance to spread your legs...err wings I mean.  For example, state that you have always been drawn to the exotic.  Canada, Cambodia, South Korea, New Zealand (this helps a lot if she/he likes Lord of the Rings or Xena: Warrior Princess), or Costa Rica are all said to be nice places to live free of student debt.  If she has longed to travel, this may be appealing.  Of course, some people are terrified of leaving the United States, and this may not be the most positive idea.  If that is the case, you can ignore this particular advice.



5.  Get him/her to believe that you find it to be somewhat worth it.

For example, you can say that "I have always wanted to go to college, and I am the first in my family to do it.  Further, this law degree is something that was important to me.  On balance, I feel like I am one step closer to achieving the goals that I set out for myself."  This shows that you are a "go-getter" or goal minded.  People seem to respect people who create a goal and go towards it.  Tell that other person that your next goal is to tackle your debt (or emigrate to Kenya).  Chances are they will swoon like no other.

***

There is a chance the other person may be put off by your telling them about your student loan debt.  If that is the case, you are better off telling her now than waiting until later.  Why waste time with someone who will not understand that you come debt saddled?  There are plenty of people out there who have debt of their own and still long for someone like you.  Telling that other person is hard, but in the end, you will feel better for having done it.  Believe it or not, there are some very nice lovable people out there who are more impressed with someone who has a college degree and don't care too much about the debt.  It's romantic to have to tackle something together.  And yes, many of these people still have all their teeth!

I would like to end this post with the lyrics to one of my favorite songs by Bad Religion.  I don't know why, but it seems fitting:

You Are (The Government)
Bad Religion, Suffer 1988


Hey sit down and listen and they'll tell you when you're wrong.
Eradicate but vindicate as "progress" creeps along.
Puritan work ethic maintains its subconscious edge
As Old Glory maintains your consciousness.
There's a loser in the house, and a puppet on the stool,
And a crowded way of life, and a black reflecting pool,
And as the people bend, the moral fabric dies,
The country can't pretend to ignore its people's cries.
You are the government.
You are jurisprudence.
You are the volition.
You are juridiction.
And I make a difference too.

Law School and Mists of Pandaria

Well, today they announced something that I have been waiting a while to find out.  The release date to the latest expansion to World of Warcraft!  I am stoked.  While I have beta access, due to my subscription to the annual pass, I have not taken advantage of playing it much (part of the blame belonging to Diablo III).  I started a monk but thought I would rather wait and see the finished product.  Well, it happens to be that the finished product comes out on a Tuesday (which I knew), and that Tuesday is when I have law school classes.  

What is a 3L to do?  I remember Cataclysm came out when I was a fresh faced 1L and I ignored it as best as I could.  While I was stoked about Cataclysm, I rarely took advantage of raiding (except for the Raid Finder in which I downed that jerk of a dragon, Deathwing).  Further, I was gung-ho about law school and wanted to do my ultra-very-best. 

So here I am, on the verge of a new expansion and wondering what expansion-ready toon I want to play.  Is it my gnome mage, my undead mage (sadly I have 2 of these), my worgen mage, my undead warlock, my undead priest, or my troll druid?  And since I will be busy with my last year of law school and the job hunting that goes with it, I won't have time to have multiple toons.  Further, I doubt I will do too much raiding in this expansion.

That being said, I am excited to see this new expansion.  I am sure I am not the only one of my readers who indulges in the nerdyness of World of Warcraft.  In fact, someone else has to be pretty stoked at seeing the graphic above.  And it's a nice break from law school.  In fact, that's one thing I have always loved about WoW -- the fact that it lets me forget about the stupidity of everyday life.  It's kind of an escape, but one that lets me think about something new, even if it is silly. 

I guess the question is: is it bad I'm thinking about skipping class to play this game on Tuesday September 25th?

Mantras for Job Hunters/I got a date!!!!

This is a double feature post.  First, I would like to talk about something that I saw on Apple's App store.  It was this program that had to do with "Mantras for job hunters".  I guess the thing is that you use these words to find a job.  A mantra is a sound, syllable, word, or group of words that is considered capable of "creating transformation".   I am sure some of you have heard of things such as "creative visualization" and the like.  For many, who are desperate to get jobs, this may be something that helps you find it.  That being said, I am very leery of this kind of thing, but whatever floats your boat.

Anyway, on that topic, I thought it would be fun to create some mantras for law school grads who are seeking jobs.  Keep in mind that many of these are just for fun.  Repeat until you believe it.

Mantras for Law School Graduates

"I am worthy of a long term position"
"My resume is polished"
"I am turning my low law school rank into a high ranking job"
"The time for me to enter the workforce is now"
"A humble man like me can be a powerhouse of industry"
"I am ready for a phone interview"
"I am turning my tier 4 JD into a tier 1 job"
"I will not let anything hold me back from success"
"My family will see me as a success"
"I never failed, I was only set back"
"Today is the day to start my real job search"
"Those spelling mistakes on my resume were only a set back"
"Mother will be proud"
"I am ready to begin my trek to become partner"
"I will not allow the Cooley name to stain me"
"I am branded for success"
"I will prove my elementary teachers right: I am special"
"I am about to be where I belong"
"Next year at this time I will be in the corner office"
"I can order this pizza tonight because I will have a job before the check goes to the bank"
"I will not allow failure to define me.  I am ready for success"
"If placed in a room of three interviewees, the others with HYS JDs, I will shine"
"I have sharpened my mind through law school and now it is time to make the cut"
"I will find a job, dang it, I will"  (begin crying here)

Although some of these were less serious than others, the truth is, sometimes getting yourself to believe something can be beneficial.  If you lament daily that you are worthless or that you will never find a job, you won't.  It's as simple as that.  You do start to believe what you tell yourself.  Now, I don't believe that these mantras have any magic.  But I think that people do hold themselves back with their thoughts.  Thoughts turn into actions.  If you don't believe you will find a job, chances are you won't look, or if you do, your beliefs will show during your interview.  Further, some people self-sabotage themselves because they are scared of some type of success.  It may change your identity or who you think you are.  Many are comfortable with who they are, even if they are not happy.  Much of life is a result of how you think and act. 

Part II:  I got a date!!!!!!
Earlier I posted advice about dating while in law school.  Well, I am going to go on a date in a few days, and I am rather excited.  I have not dated in a long time, and I don't consider myself to be that great at it.  That being said, I think we are going to do the dinner and a movie thing, maybe walk through a park (maybe the High Line in Manhattan) and get some ice cream.  I am thinking Indian sounds good and as far as the movie, something like Batman.  She says she likes Sci-Fi stuff, and even mentioned that she likes Dr. Who (which, to be honest, I am not a huge fan of). 



How did I meet this woman you ask?  Well, I met her online and she seems very sweet.  I am not much of a 'people person' and since most of my 'social life' takes place around the confines of a deep dark and dank law school, I figured that getting out into the sun, which I am usually not a friend to (I like the cool fog and the cloudy morns myself), would be beneficial.  In fact, I am really really excited for this date, as I said.

I have mentioned to this girl that I am a law student, and she did not say much one way or the other, but had some questions about how I liked it and all that.  I am sure we will talk about it.  She's a student too, but undergraduate still.  I don't think she has any interest in going to law school herself, so that's a really good thing.

I don't want to get too excited yet, as I have not actually met her in person, but I have talked to her quite a bit.  She's kind of strange like myself.  She doesn't seem too obsessive about making a lot of money or that kind of thing. 

Anyway, I really hope this works out.  I never thought about having a bona fide girlfriend throughout law school.  It would probably affect my studies, but at the same time, it would make me have something to focus on other than books, books, and the professors scalding looks.

Truckin' my way through law school.

To learn some CB lingo, head on over to: http://www.thetruckersreport.com/trucker-slang-and-cb-radio-lingo/

Breaker Breaker, this is Law Rig, anyone else out there?
10-4 Law Rig, this is Mack Daddy.  What's your 20?
Just finishing up this law school run.

Many people wonder why I am still in law school, given that I don't know that I want to practice law.  It is a question I am asked regularly enough that I thought I would let the world know exactly why I am still truckin' my way through law school.

First, I would like to say that when I entered my first year of law school I was a starry eyed 1L who thought law school was the most amazing thing in the world.  I honestly loved briefing cases, learning the 'black letter law' as they called it, and immersing myself in my studies.  I did very well in my first year of law school, as a result.  However, I did not make law review, which was one thing that upset me, and it was part of the reason I grew somewhat complacent during my first semester of being a 2L.  However, even at that time I had no aspirations of quitting law school.  And I knew I was in deep.



I continued to trudge my way through law school, and in the middle of that same semester, I started making this blog.  At first I thought it would be a fun way in which to express my distaste for certain parts of law school.  Some things had begun to annoy me greatly (as is the case with many things in life).  Further, I started to notice other similar blogs about law school.  Some were from kids with rosy glasses and others were from people like Nando, who I stumbled upon.  I read most of his blog entries about different law schools and began thinking about law school a bit differently.  Further, I noticed that my law grades had plummeted.  I began to ask myself some hard questions such as "do I want to do this?"  Further, I did not find my legal internships as enjoyable as I once imagined.  They were nothing like what I saw in the show "Perry Mason" (although I knew they would be different).  I was merely a slave boy working for free.  It was all rather depressing.  However, I figured I would continue through my second year, as I had a lease on an apartment and to quit law school would mean I would be evicted, and that I would not only have dropped out of school, but have an eviction on my record. 


In my second semester of the 2L year I did much better than I did in the first semester.  My grades were somewhat respectable.  That made me feel better, even if it was somewhat meaningless.  It at least showed me that it wasn't me as a person who was a dolt.  And although my grades will not land me a job, I realize that they can at least help my self-esteem, which is worth perhaps more than money.

Now I am about to enter my third year.  A "rising 3L".  I could quit now.  However, I would have to find a job immediately, as I am still paying a small fortune for rent here in New York.  Either that or I can finish the game.  One more year.  I will have the JD, the option to take the bar, the option to do something as far as legal work.  Further, my debt right now is very large.  One more year isn't going to be much of a change as far as it being 'manageable'.  As it stands now, I will have to do IBR (Income Based Repayment) whether or not it's $150k or $200k.  On top of that, I don't mind leaving the US after law school.  I have spent some time in Asia and Europe, as well as Central America, and I know that I could be happy in any of those places.  I have planned on retiring outside of the US for a very long time now.  If I had to leave sooner, I would not bemoan the fact.  Further, I have considered leaving to teach English outside of the US after law school.  Although it's not a glamorous job, it's something I would not mind doing.   In fact, the prospect excites me.

Having weighed all the options for myself, I think the best course of action is to finish.  If I was a 1L still I would have probably dropped out and at least did something else.  However, I am too far in for that now.  So, I shall finish the game, down the boss, and maybe get a little bit of loot, even if it's merely a piece of paper.

I despise suits!

Why did I go to school for a profession that will make me wear something that I absolutely detest wearing?  I don't like suits one bit.  I never have.  I would much rather wear a pair of jeans instead of those black/grey suit pants.  I would rather have a loose fitting shirt than something clinging at my neck, choking me.  Why, then did I go to law school?

The truth is, I may have forgot about the wearing of the suits.  Many of the scam blogs state that there are very few law jobs going around, thus I may not have to wear the suit.  I guess that would be something to tell myself if I can't find a law job.  Maybe not getting a job wouldn't be so bad, because I would not have to walk around looking like a mentally challenged penguin.I sometimes wonder why, as humans, we have standards that make it more uncomfortable for us all.  Why not, instead of wearing suits, allow blue jeans and t-shirts to be the business norm?  Would the world as a whole really hurt?  Perhaps something could be done to make 'business' blue jeans and t-shirts be a bit more classy looking.  But, does it really look so bad in the first place?  Maybe we could all go naked? 

I once read a poem about footie pajamas and law.  There was a line about a charcoal grey lawyer's suit and footie pajamas.  Imagine, wearing footie pajamas to court.  If I was on my way out as an attorney, I think I would do that.  Show up at court in footie pajamas.  Maybe if I get another internship, and I don't like it, I will do just that.  In fact, everyone who sympathizes with the scam blogs should wear footie pajamas to class one day to show how they feel about out of control tuition prices and the enrollment of far too many students. 

The truth is, I never liked footie pajamas much.  I usually sleep in the nude, as clothing is too restricting.  Of course, this may be too much information for most of my readers, but I thought I should just come out with it.  I like comfort.  Who doesn't, though?  I mean, honestly, why do you want some cloth (other than a blanket to keep warm) wrapping around you and choking you while you sleep? 


Law may be one of the most uncomfortable professions.  Law school, while not as bad as some say, is not as easy as many 'lay people' think (although some lay people probably find it to be harder than it really is).  It's not the reading and the writing that is hard.  Instead it is the mental aspect that can drive some people crazy.  For example, being called on when you don't expect it.  Having to recite a case in front of the whole class is something I do not enjoy.  I never liked being the center of attention, so you can imagine how I feel when I am put on the spot.  Further, hearing about how some are seeming to succeed while you feel like a failure.  Add to that the curve and the fact that some people get on law review and flaunt it.  Further, the countdown until graduation when it's either get a job or get packing.  Sadly, I don't have much of a choice with that matter, as moving in with my parents is not an option after law school.  So, if I don't find work, and any work, I would probably be living at some kind of homeless shelter on the outskirts of town (either that or being a hobo, riding the rails into the sunset). 




Life as a hobo may not be so bad.  Think about it.  Seeing the country pass you by from a box car.  Sure, there are other hobos, some crazy.  And then there the stories of gangs that kill the homeless.  But, imagine that kind of freedom.  Of course, being somewhat obsessed with cleanliness would make that kind of life hard.  Imagine, cooking dinner out under the stars in a small pan.  The wind rustling through the trees as the moon rises high above.  The sounds of the few wild animals that are still left.  The coyotes howling through the night as you lie down for a short sleep.  The four o' clock train will be through this part in only a few hours, then it's onward to Omaha.  I hear there's some good chances for practicing law out in Nebraska.  I wonder if anyone would hire me with a full beard down to my chest covered in grass.  Of course, my clothing smells awful and my breath is worse. 


"Hello, I was wondering if you were hiring lawyers?  I got a JD from a fine institution.  It's in my bag here somewhere."
"Get the hell out of here!"
"I'm serious sir.  Now, where did I put it?"
"I'm calling Sheriff John Barker."
"Wait now, no need to call the police.  I have that degree, it's just in my back pouch.  I think I might have spilled beans on them though.  That can that I pilfered from a dumpster back in Chicago was kinda leaky."
"I said get out of here now or you'll be going to... well I'll be a son of... you do have a degree, and from a higher ranked school than I went to."
"Yeah, told you so.  Hirin'?"

Who knows, maybe being a hobo would be the ticket for a while.  It would beat living with and leeching off my parents (which I already told you was not an option for me).  Further, it would be better than sitting in a homeless shelter, sitting in line for food stamps and other aid, spending my day bound up in the bureaucracy that consumes those places.

I wonder if the lawyers wear suits in those rural areas?  Maybe they wear blue jeans and cowboy boots to court, and the judge wears a ten gallon hat?  I wonder if they would hire a hobo fresh from a train with a JD in his backpack?  Do you think they would?  It's an interesting thought.

Dating in Law School

Are you looking for love in law school, or have you graduated law school and wonder if any woman/man in her right mind will take you?  Well, I have some thoughts on the subject.  Before I begin I want to state that these are mainly my perceptions, and they may be wrong.  Further, I am up to being challenged on them, so if you disagree and have anything to add, go ahead and put it in the comments section.

It seems that today being in a relationship is of the utmost importance.  We see it all the time in the media, on movies, and in the books we read.  The idea of being alone is a miserable thought to many of us who crave the intimacy of some kind of partnership with another living breathing human being.  Being alone, society has told us, is a curse.  I disagree.  For some people, being single is a great thing.  There are many individuals who have gone on to do great things with their lives and have been single.  Further, many people have found happiness being single.   However, that does not help those who truly yearn for some kind of mate.

So, say you are in law school and looking for a partner.  Where should you be looking?  In the classroom, outside of the classroom?  Should you look in the law review area (that's where the real geniuses hang out)?  Should you look in the law school cafeteria?  Well, personally, I would never date another law student.  Well, I should not say never, but I would be incredibly careful about doing so.  First of all, one thing I have noticed about many (not all, but many) people in law school is that they think very, very highly of themselves.  Some will outright say that they are amongst the smartest people in society (just because they finished their first year of law school).  I would not want someone who incorrectly thinks that they are superior in such a way.  They say confidence turns on the opposite sex, but that is not confidence.  That's more akin to an ego that has got out of control.

Further, some would consider the debt level of the person they were dating, especially if one is marriage minded.  Do you want to go into a marriage with huge debt?  Personally, with the debt I carry, this would not be a huge issue to me.  I realize that if I was to double it, it will still be almost impossible to pay off.  Further, having a life partner, and someone you love and cherish for the rest of your life, is worth more than a legal education.  So, if I took on $200,000 of debt for law school, why not take on an extra $200,000 (or more) for someone that I can spend the rest of my life with? 

I would consider looking outside of law school for a partner.  Some say that older women do not find a law student or lawyer to be that great of a thing anymore.  Sure, an unemployed lawyer is not going to appeal to some women.  Many women do want a man who makes good money.  However, money is not everything, and there are many women out there who just want someone who they can be a partner with.  These are the kind of women I would search for.  Even a person making $200k a year can become disabled or fired.  If the partner would leave me over such a thing, then I would not want to be with that person.  Further, I don't think that there's anything wrong with finding a woman from the type of background where she would be impressed by a law student or lawyer.  Just because a woman does not make a great amount of money or have a impressive education doesn't mean she can't be an amazing person.  In fact, I have found women from these types of backgrounds to be more 'real' and accepting. 



One other piece of advice is to not chase that partner away with your lamenting over high debt.  Although you may have incredible debt levels (I do), I do not lose sleep over it, nor would I make my partner feel fear over it.  I know that I have to do something about the debt I have taken on, and making myself scared over it, or making my partner scared over it won't change a thing.  I am reminded of Tuvok on Star Trek: Voyager who states that lamenting over something will not change what is already there.  I have my whole life ahead of me to correct the debt, and even if I take it to my grave, it can not take away my chance to have an amazing relationship with another human being.

Law School Attitudes

There are many attitudes regarding the law school system.  They range from the attitudes of the scam bloggers, who tend to be angry at the system which pooped them out with less than they entered with.  Big debt and little job prospects are the issues that the scambloggers seem to take.  Further issues include a total disregard for economic principles by a system known as the ABA.

There are some who love the law school system.  The deans and many of the professors (but not all) seem to really enjoy it.  And why would they not?  It seems like an easy enough job.  Maybe not as easy as some say.  However, to be paid $100-200k a year, and sometimes more, to teach a few classes and correct some essays once a semester doesn't seem like a bad gig.  To be honest, I'd take it. 

Then there are the lethargic students who I come in contact with.  They are very quiet about a lot of things, so I can't really gauge what they are thinking.  Many seem to not know about the real job market, although many are scared.  However, few are at the point as another scamblogger, JDPainterGuy, where they wish they never went to law school in the first place.

Some individuals are very depressed.  They are at the point of suicidal thoughts and thinking that their life will never be the same again.  One individual posted a comment on another law school blog relating to a plumber friend he knew that made an exceptional amount of money. 

Times have changed. I would trade my degrees to be able to have a job where I know things will get better, where I know I will not be replaced by a slave from the third world, and where I know that some political force would intervene on my behalf when things looked bleak. I would do this even if it meant working physically hard.

There are worse things in life than working with your hands, and when I finally decide to blow my brains out to end my mental anguish, I will have been living proof of it.

This is where I do not want to be.  However, at the same time, I understand that it is very hard to not feel down sometimes when you expected life to turn out a lot differently.  Many of the lethargic students at the law school where I attend will probably one day feel this way.  They still have expectations of law being a glamorous and wealth creating profession for anyone who can get a 148 on the LSAT. 



Many of these students have not looked at a 'scamblog' nor have they really got to see the life of a lawyer after law school.  Before I enrolled I had no idea what a lawyer did (other than what I saw from a couple episodes of Perry Mason.  Plus, Captain Picard in Star Trek the Next Generation does a bit of lawyering in a couple of the episodes).  Sadly, the big feeder web forum for law students, Top-Law-Schools, will stop at nothing to block links to scamblogs.  Nando's opus, ThirdTierReality has been redubbed "T14 Paradise".  If anything, it is a tyrannical mockery of the intelligence of a breed of people who has been told over and over that they are some of society's smartest individuals (a point that I seriously question -- many law students I have come in contact with show no more intelligence than many undergrads).  If anything, TLS (the dungheap of the law world) is doing their students an injustice by not allowing them to see alternative facts and make up their own still-developing and often childlike minds. 

I think that there is some importance to the power of positive thinking.  I think that telling yourself day after day that your life is worthless is not the right path to take.  Just because you did not do well in the legal field after believing you would does not make you a bad person.  There is still much that a person can do to better themselves and live a great life.  Although you may not make $160,000 a year in law, nor do you have any connections, you can still contribute something to the world.  I am saddened when I see a person state that they want to off themselves because of law school.  While three years and $200-300k is a lot of money, a life is worth much more.  I would propose taking some time out of your day and forgetting about law school and asking yourself what you want to do with the remainder of your life.  It is hard with student loans and debt, but nobody can take your life from you.  Why would you take it away from yourself?

---

By the way, for some reason this blog was not allowing comments.  It now allows comments from anyone (anonymous included), so if you want to say something, feel free. 

Banned From Top-Law-Schools

LOL I was banned from TLS, reason: "Stop spamming sh***y websites".  Seems that they don't like to know the truth.  Sadly, those kid$ think that they will be rolling in money once graduation comes, and nobody can say otherwise. 

Is it wrong to mislead a person?

TLS is no different than the deans and the schools.  They keep the false hopes of these unattainable dreams alive for many.

Why should my TTTT be thought of in a negative light?

Because, someone on TLS might have their feelings hurt.  Instead, these kids should be spending upwards of $50,000 tuition alone to attend a school that later on they may wish they would have not went to.  Further, if they had the full information, these kids would have probably done something else with their lives. 

How many law students wish they majored in something else?

A lot, probably.  In fact, I do.  I wish I would have known the truth about the numbers and the rankings and all that other crap.  However, truth is, I never learned about it.  Some of these people will only find out when it's too late, as sites like Third Tier Reality and others are marked as SPAM on the site, hiding the links, hiding the information. 

What is the point of Top-Law-Schools?

It's the number one site on the internet to stroke your own ego.  People love to post topics such as "in at Harvard" or "top 5% at Georgetown".   Also, while some recognize that the job market is bad, they will act like they are golden and everyone else is doomed.

In conclusion, Top-Law-Schools is trash.  It's no better than the law schools or the deans as far as I am concerned.  The admins are power hungry lemmings who refuse to allow any contrary information to flow.  Hiding information from the people is no better than tyranny.  Top-Law-Schools is a tyrannical website that should not be used in conjunction with one's "law school experience".  The truth is, I see a bunch of kids that are going to have a miserable life ahead of them, or some that are already so miserable with themselves as human beings that they treat others like garbage, including the naysayers who have an important message.  Any website that REFUSES to show contrary information should not be consulted for lifelong advice on anything that could cause a person to go $100-200,000 in debt.  Top-Law-Schools is TRASH. 

A new forum has been created for this site, feel free to begin posting.   You can post as a guest and do not need to register to enjoy it.  http://lawschool.myfreeforum.org/index.php

Finding a Job as a Law Student

I got friends in high places, where the money pours in and the women chase their non-existent blues away.  They'll be okay...

Sometimes I look at my life and I look at the things which are lacking.  I have never worked a real job, nor have I ever had a real income (I once worked part time at $13.25 an hour which was really nice at the time).  However, that being said, the idea of working in the private sector scares me greatly.  After some of the places I have worked, I have found myself unhappy.  For example, in the jobs I have found myself at, people tend to only fend for themselves, and really not care about the feelings of the employee.  At the same time, the employee is told that the customer, no matter how wrong, is always right.  No matter what they say or do, they are right, and we are wrong. 

I want to change my outlook on life.  I do not want to think that my life is lacking.  I do not want to think that I would be happier in some position making money.  I tell myself that I would one day like a piece of land or something like that (I am starting to get sick of apartment living).  However, I feel at the current rate of my earnings in life, that is a long time off.  I mean, if I can't even get a summer job at Starbucks, how am I supposed to bring in a solid income?  What was the point of my Bachelor's degree if I can't use it to find a barista job?  It is really annoying to me, as I spent a lot of time and money, and lived in relative squalor to achieve it.  After it was said and done, the friends I had in high school who decided to not go to college are making far more than I do.  It is crazy, to say the least.

For example, this semester I will get $11,000 in living expenses in loans.  My rent is $1,300, which is far more than I wanted to pay, but it took me a long time to get the place I have here in NY, as I did not have a cosigner, I have no job and income, and every other landlord I talked to said they would not take a student.  For five months that comes out to be $6,500 in rent.  Then I need books and money to get to school, food and utilities (I don't eat much, nor do I go out and 'enjoy life').  Further, I will need to put some money aside for next summer, as I don't get aid in the summer (will be graduated) and what am I to do then?  How will I pay rent without any money coming in?

I find myself thinking that even if I was lucky enough to make $35,000 a year I would be doing far better than I ever have.  In fact, after being in college most of my adult life, I have never once had that kind of money come in during a year.  With my frugal lifestyle I could probably save up something, and on top of that, with an income I could probably get a cheaper apartment.  Since I don't drive and rarely go out, I would be saving more.  If anything, college has taught me to be frugal and cheap.  I have realized I don't require much to live on, nor do I find myself wanting much.  I have realized that most material possessions are a waste of time and money.  Yet, at the same time, I would like to make some type of money.  Is it really that hard to find a decent job?  Hell, I am at the point right now that if I could find something, almost anything for $35,000 I would quit law school in a heartbeat.

In a heartbeat...

I didn't learn the right things...

After looking at the jobs on the school's career site this morning and on Craigslist makes me all the more ready to enlist in the military after I graduate law school.  The idea of working in the private sector no longer appeals to me at all.  I am baffled at the internship "opportunities" that are offered.  People basically want you to be their slave.  Some offer a small stipend of $12/hour so you can really slave for them. 

One example on my college's website of full time labor was a paralegal position for a firm that works with low income households.  Your reward for working for this firm is, of course, being a low income household yourself.  Perhaps they will help you apply for Food Stamps (I have already done this before, so already know the process.)  This job, in New York, NY states: Salary is $31,518 to $34,670 annually with extensive employee benefits.  I suppose that is more than I have ever made, and to be honest, I would be somewhat happy to have a job with that kind of wage, yet at the same time, it would be tough to pay back $200,000+ of college loans on that wage and live in NY.  What would I have left to save in order to buy property, start my own business, or enjoy live?  Is that the cost of a college education?

Another Summer internship I found was quite upsetting, to be honest.  Here's the jist from the ad:

The individual should have a demonstrated commitment to either public interest law, civil rights and/or labor and employment law on behalf of plaintiffs-employees, combating unlawful discrimination in employment, education and housing, First Amendment and Due Process claims/ rights on behalf of civil rights litigants, and/or issues of social/ economic justice.

Also, potential applicants should be interested in working at a law firm where ninety percent (90%) or more of its practice is devoted to litigation in the NY State and federal courts, and in administrative proceedings such us before the EEOC or US Dept. of Labor. A small percentage of work will probably involve assisting in compliance issues, counseling and/or assisting in representing small to medium sized employers located in the NYC metropolitan and Mid-Hudson Valley areas.

The intern would be responsible for the following tasks, which includes but is not limited to: doing intake of and discussion with potential clients; performing legal research (knowledge of WestLaw is highly preferred, but capability in Lexis would suffice although the applicant would have to independently have access to Lexis); drafting legal memoranda and opinions; assist me in bringing on motions, including but not limited to motions for summary judgment and discovery motions (e.g., motions to compel) and in opposing motions to dismiss, summary judgment and discovery motions; substantial document review; deposition transcript review and digesting; and assist me at depositions, trials, court conferences, and hearings.

A Spanish speaking individual is preferred, but knowledge of Spanish is not necessary. Lastly, although much of the work can be done from a remote location, it is preferred that applicants reside in the NYC metropolitan area, and preferably in either NYC or the Mid-Hudson Valley areas (i.e., Westchester; Rockland; Orange; Putnam; Dutchess; Sullivan and/or Ulster Counties).

Sadly, I don't know how to do most of that stuff.  One reason I do not apply for internships now is because I was expected to know all of this stuff at my last job.  Law school does NOT prepare a student to do these things, yet for some reason, the employers expect students to know how.  It's rather upsetting that I will be graduating this year and will have no idea what the hell these things are.  And since I was not in the top 5% of my class I could not get an internship with a large firm that actually has a training program which teaches its interns how to do these things. 

I will be glad when I am done with all this.  I wish I would have learned how to do all these things that I don't know how to do, but it will soon be over and I will be done with it all.  Good riddance.

Is Law School "Still" a Golden Ticket?

So, this dirty article is going around the scam-blogs like wildfire and I just wanted to add my two cents to it.  It's from Forbes Magazine.  It's a business magazine that the big wigs like to read.  Some of the lower elite also sometimes look at this magazine.  Lawyers, I am told (like, real life lawyers™) read this as well.  Anyway, before mauling and eviscerating the article to death, I will let you read it if you are not familiar with it. 

http://www.forbes.com/sites/shenegotiates/2012/06/19/is-law-school-still-a-golden-ticket

Young Jessi, who is going to a graduate program at Penn State is gearing up to get her Golden Ticket.  She feels like the kid in Willy Wonka, but instead of a butt-load of chocolate, she will be sinking her molars into a Juris Doctorate.  Even with a degree in English Literature, however, her writing skills lack.  Yet, to my dismay and ultimate confusion, Forbes actually published this story.

What has happened to news media when a story comprised of three word sentences and two sentence paragraphs written at a level that a 2nd grader could easily comprehend (and write) makes its way into a "respected" business publication? 

What the hell is a "nasty gram"?

Our writer states:

A bachelor’s degree just does not allow you to send a Govern Yourself Accordingly nasty gram.

What the heck does that even mean?  She wants to fight for the little guy, and she is moved by injustice.  And yet, she refuses to think creatively.   She has obviously watched WAY too much Perry Mason and Judge Joe Brown, because like many who I have met in my life, they think law is the ONLY way in which you can help out those less fortunate.  Yet I know plumbers, mechanics and other service people who spend their lives making other people's lives better.  Further, I have noticed that poor people stay far away from lawyers.  They are scared of the fees and are wary of the system.  I have had relatives who can no longer work due to working in horrible conditions that are far below OSHA standards and who will refuse to see a lawyer.  It's not the 'little guy' who usually seeks out the law to take care of the problems they have.  That's the big guy, lady.

She states that she is not going to make money, but the next sentence in her amazingly written article starts Justice, and a Little Money Along the Way.  Did I mention that this is one of the WORST articles I have read in a LONG TIME?  Maybe that's one reason why it's gone viral in the scamblog movement.

Scientific, I’m sure.  I wonder if she will make law review?

But, for the summer, I will indulge in the hope and fresh excitement of feeling like the keys to the kingdom are about to get handed to me.

It’s my turn.

The keys to the kingdom?  The article is full of cliches like this.  Again, how did this make it into Forbes?  Why did they publish this?  Has the news media literally gone to crap?  Personally, I don't read much mainstream news, nor do I waste my brain cells on the television news.  This is just another reminder of how stupid society can be at times.  This honestly may win the award for the WORST ARTICLE I have read in my life. 

She was a communications aide in the Florida Governor’s Office and worked in cable news.
...and she wrote that? Seriously?  I can not help but wonder how she is going to understand some of those dense cases with a history of writing stuff like the article I just ambushed, stunlocked, and garroted.  I have a feeling in a few years she's going to realize that there is NO GOLDEN TICKET in life.

Independence Day

I am sitting alone in the living room.  The apartment is dark.  The blinds are down, because it is hot.  I find my mind wandering.  I recently interviewed for a fall position at local clinic.  I can't help but wonder, "will I get the position?" 

There are many qualified applicants.  Why would they choose me?  What do I have to offer?  After all, I am not working this summer.  At the same time, I realize that if I don't push myself forward, I will always remain behind.  I do not want to be the kind of law graduate that wallows in self pity because he had trouble finding a job, could not find a job, or had dreams of a large salary.  Instead, I want to do what I can while I am in school, see how well I can do, and make it into something worthwhile. 

Tomorrow is Independence Day in the United States.  July 4th.  For some reason they decided to have it on a Wednesday this year.  There will be fireworks bursting in the air and all sorts of revelry.  I am sure the lawyers will still be working, even if the court houses are closed.  I wonder if I get a job in the legal field after law school, will I be working on July 4th? 

Back in the day I used to go with my family to a place where two rivers met.  It was out in the country.  They had fireworks there, but always did it on the weekend.  A casino put it on.  It was up by an Indian reservation on the west coast.  I always liked going there.  It was nice.  We'd have a picnic, hike to see some ruins, and relax by the water.  It was generally hot out.  Back then I had a lot of grand ideas for my future.  I did not imagine that I would be a lawyer.  Instead, I thought I may one day have my own business or something.  Maybe I'd go into a field that had very little competition, such as Celtic Studies. 

I have not been to the place where the two rivers meet to see the fireworks in many years now.  I wish I could go back to those days and revel in them.  Sometimes we imagine ourselves as doing something and those things turn out just the opposite.  Sometimes we day dream about the future when it's the past that we end up longing for. 

I hope everyone has a nice 4th of July, even if it is on a Wednesday this year.