You shoulda been a.... Teacher!

When people think about what they want to do after college, two things often come to mind.  The first is get married, the second is have kids.  Well, as a lawyer the idea of kids may mean baby goats if you head out to Nebraska to represent farmers in cow tippin' court.

Another way in which you could have got some time with children is by being a teacher.  Not only that, but you would even have time (and money) to make some of your own.  The truth is, many lawyers eventually become teachers, but with enough debt carried over to create a tumor.  Why not just consider teaching from the get go and save yourself the hassle (and debt)?

Not everything is wonderful about being a teacher.  For example, not everyone likes kids, and high school students can be rough.  There are people in this world who can not fathom having to hear about Justin Beiber and Twilight all day long, but for $45-50,000 starting salary in some cities, it's not bad.  It sure beats having a law firm partner breathing down your neck.

Then there is that whole summer vacation thing.  Imagine, having some time off every year to spend in whatever location you so desire.  I didn't do too well in my tax class, but there might be a way to write off the vacation if you went to gather information for the classroom (I'm probably wrong). 

The cost of being a teacher is a lot lower than going to law school.  There is a teach grant which gives an undergraduate and graduate student a decent chunk of change to teach in a high need area for a few years.  Further, you can start teaching right out of undergrad in some states.  That means while you are graduate school you can work full time AND go to college.  Imagine pulling in a full time income, going to class part time AND getting a grant on top of it.  Doesn't seem too bad. 

Teacher: What a great summer, I just got back from paradise and I am ready to start work again.
Lawyer: Paradise? Summer?  I forgot what those words mean.
Teacher: You mean you did not get a vacation?  I got at least two months off!
Lawyer:  I got to drive to Jersey to pick up a client.  Does that count?

You may be thinking that being a teacher sounds dumb.  It's no where as prestigious as BigLaw.  Well, I have news for you, prestige is overrated.  So what, you'll miss out on getting your shoes shined every day.  Teachers generally enjoy a high position in their communities.  If you want to live in a small town, you can really make a name for yourself as a teacher.  Teachers are almost like demigods in small towns.  Especially the ones that coach on the side.  Of course, some teachers struggle.  There is no profession that is free of people who don't do well, but every school needs teachers.  Face it, people are having kids and someone has to teach them.  And there is no sign of high school and elementary teaching being outsourced any time soon. 

But I hate kids

You hate kids huh?  Well, you might realize that some of your clients may act like children or worse.  Are you prepared to get a phone call at 3:00AM from an angry spouse telling you all about what his husband/her wife did?  Some people hate kids, others hate to work, but you are going to have to do the latter in order to make money unless you are connected or have the winning lottery ticket in your back pocket. 

My friend was a teacher and she hated it. 

My friend hates Brussels Sprouts, does that mean I should have never tried them?  I'm glad I did try them, because I actually really like them.  My cats hate getting a bath, but I enjoy it.  Just because someone hates something, does that mean you will?  Do you like the idea of $150,000 debt?  How about a job where you can sit back and read Charolette's Web to a bunch of sleepy 1st graders?  If you go into BigLaw you won't have any time to read anything so "voluminous" on the side.   You'll be lucky if you even get to use the bathroom.



I want to help other people though.  I just gotta be a lawyer!

Yeah, because law is the only profession in which a person can help another.  I forgot, teachers don't do anything of value for society.  They just teach children how to read and write.  Wrong!  A teacher can make a huge difference in many people's lives.  Good teachers are remembered by their students forever.  I have a friend who is 31 who STILL talks about his elementary school teachers on a regular basis.  How many people fondly speak of their lawyer 25 years after having seen them last? 

Should I marry a person with student loan debt?

No matter who you marry, you're still on the bottom.

One of my readers asked me: "Should I marry a man (or woman) with student loan debt?"  I am no woman, but I will tell you that student loan debt is a serious issue right now in this country of ours.  For example, it is said that over $1 trillion dollars is tied up in student loans.  That's a lot of money!  However, the truth is, student loan debt is owed in different amounts by different people.  For example, some people owe only a few hundred dollars, while others owe over $300,000!

Here's an interesting story about a guy who could not pass the character and fitness portion of the bar exam due to student loan debt:  character & fitness fail for law school graduate due to student loans.  Now that's scary, because I will be graduating with over $150k in student loan debt (his debt was $170k).  That being said, this is something to seriously consider for the law student and for the would be spouse of a law student or graduate.  Do you want to be marrying into that kind of debt?
(Please, do yourself a favor and don't read the comments of the link above.  They are awful.)

Related Post: Suicide and Student Loan Debt.

Now, let's just back up a second.  Money is one thing, but so is love.  Some people are more into money than love, and others are more into love than money.  Some people have visions of an adult life full of wealth and prestige.  $adly, for these people, the real world may be knocking soon, and chances are, their fantasies will soon be crushed by reality.  Others have dreams of a perfect relationship.  This, in my opinion, is easier to get to than the world of wealth and prestige.  I have seen people on the lower end of the socioeconomic stratum that were deeply in love until their death.  However, this is not generally the case if the two people can not get past the issues of money.

Money is a powerful force in our world.  People are obsessed with it.  Many would give almost anything for money.  Relationships are born and die due to money.  Many divorces are the result of lifestyle and money issues.  Two individuals that could have been happy together end up otherwise due to the disagreements brought on by money woes.  Money in itself is not evil.  It's just a way to buy and sell, just as trading is a way to exchange items.  However, many people do not understand the intricacies of money, and many think that money is the end of everything in life. 

I would say, in response to the question, if a person should marry another person with student loan debt: it depends.  Do you know how to deal with money?  Does that person share your same views in regards to money and how to spend?  Are you both frugal, or is only one of you?  If one person is frugal and the other is not, chances are there will be strife.

For example, I have known people who are very frugal and are/were married to individuals who liked to spend.  The frugal person would work hard to save, and the spender would work hard to spend.  Everything that one person would try to put aside the other person would spend!  It is very hard to avoid strife in that kind of relationship.  Before getting married, two people should try to figure out how they plan on spending money.  Put together a budget and a list of goals.  Do you both share the same dreams of buying a house, moving to the suburbs, having six kids and a minivan?  Do you both want a state of the art time share in Playa Del Carmen, Mexico?  Well, that won't happen if one of the spouses needs the newest clothing every other week, or if one of the people demands on carrying the newest gadgets.

Sadly, the people who I see who have money differences generally get divorced and fight over money (and often children) issues for the remainder of their youth.  This is no way a marriage should be.  So, I say, if you are thinking of getting married to a person with debt, you must ask if you are both willing to tackle that debt.

Second, ask: Are we both willing to live under our means for the first few years at least?  (If so, read my first post on being frugal.)  Chances are you will both be working to pay off that large debt for a long time.  It may mean putting off a house or a minivan or oodles of children for a few years.  There is no reason you can not have some things, but you can't expect to have your cake and eat it too.  There are always trade offs in life, and there will be in such a relationship.  You just have to be realistic.

If you both can agree on the way you manage money, savings plans, goals, and spending patterns, and you both love each other, there is no reason why you should not both get married.  There are far worse things in the world than marrying a person with inordinate student debt.

A Trip to the Psychiatrist: Session I

It's so expensive these days to afford a psychiatrist or counselor, especially when riding over $100,000 of student loan debt. So I thought I would be my own counselor, as it's not too hard to figure out what they would ask you, and the answers are all up to me anyway.   So I am going to write about my feelings and thoughts here, as if I was talking to a real psychiatrist.
 
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Psychiatrist: How are you today?

Me:  I’m having a more ‘positive’ day.  There was no law school classes today, spring break is around the corner, and afterward it’s all downhill on the way towards summer.  Well, I still have to find a summer job, and I am going back home for the first time since starting law school, and frankly, I’m a bit nervous about that.

Psychiatrist:  I see.  What makes you nervous about going back home?

Me:  Well, my parents think I am going to be a rich lawyer, but not all lawyers are wealthy.  Many are actually deep in, as a fellow scamblogger would say, NON-DISCHARGEABLE student loan debt.  They seem to have watched a butt ton of Perry Mason and similar shows and have based reality around television.

Psychiatrist:  That sounds like psychiatrists.  I am very lucky to have this job. 

Me: Well, you only have a job inside of my mind.  Furthermore, what really irks me about it is that my parents are divorced and live in opposite sides of the state, so when I go back I have to explain the law thing twice and they may think I don’t know what I’m talking about.

Psychiatrist:  How does that make you feel?

Me:  Not too good.  I try to not think about it, as I won’t be going back until May, so I have time to get myself prepared for it.  And finals.  And find a summer job.  And figure out what to do after graduating.

Psychiatrist:  Do all law students feel this way?

Me:  No, not at all.  Some are excited to be there.  In 1L law students are like children, playing with color highlighters and trying to appear smarter than their peers.  They are all fighting for the top grades and play a game of seeing who can talk the most in class.  In 2L the students realize that they are in deep now and the color highlighters are not as appealing.  In fact, by that time they are sick of carrying the books and say ‘screw the highlighters’, highlighting instead in pen or not reading much at all.  I don’t know much about 3L, but I would imagine it has something to do with those suicide cards I keep seeing around my law school.

Psychiatrist:  Whoa, back up.  Suicide cards?  

Me:  Yeah, there’s these little cards around in envelopes about the signs of suicide.  I have not heard of anyone in my class doing it, but it’s obviously a concern.  I think I put one of those cards in my wallet actually.  You know, to have a jump on 3L.

Psychiatrist:  Earlier you said you were having a more ‘positive’ day today.  Tell me, what is a more ‘negative’ day like?

Me:  Well, I skip class, figuring ‘what’s the point?’  Then a few hours later, when I realize class was going, I feel like an idiot.  I wonder what I am missing, if something I missed will be on the test.  I think of how much I am paying per class, it’s a few hundred dollars probably.  I mean, if I paid for a plane ticket to Cancun, which is about what a day of law school costs, would I just skip it?  I think not.  

Psychiatrist:  I can see why you would be upset.  Anything else?

Me:  Well, on those days I find myself looking at the job sites, wondering if I could find a job outside of the law.  I sometimes send a few e-mails out and maybe a resume or two, but then I ask myself if I would skip class to go to an interview, and what would I say?  Would I say I am in law school?  Would I say I am dropping out or plan on dropping out?  What would I say I did for the last couple years if I didn’t say I was in law school?  I then feel like I really should have went to class.  

Psychiatrist:  When was the last time you missed a class?

Me:  Over a week ago.  

Psychiatrist:  How does that make you feel?

Me:  A bit better.  In a way.  I still wonder what the point is, sometimes.   I just sit there in some of my classes and wonder what the point to all this stuff is.  I mean, sometimes I read the books and there is this long case.  I read it and try to understand it.  I try to go through it slow, taking in the law like a man takes in a good looking woman.  I mingle the thoughts around in my mind, feeling real good because I am learning stuff and I feel I can use this information on the next exam.  Then I write all that stuff down in my notebook, all the rules and stuff.  Then, I read on and at the end of the case, in the notes, it says the case was overturned.  I wonder why the hell I had to read that long case if it was just overturned in the end. Furthermore, the book doesn’t say why exactly the case was overturned, so I am thinking ‘what the hell is the point of all this stupid theory?’  I want to learn how to file a lawsuit, and I don’t mean civil procedure cases.  I want to learn how to physically do a case.    

Psychiatrist:  I can imagine so.  Maybe one day the law schools will learn that they need to teach you all more hands on.  Kind of like how a dentist learns dentistry or a brain surgeon learns surgery. 
 
Me:  That would be nice.  But then I wonder, why not now?  What am I paying for?

Psychiatrist:  Well, maybe you could be a professor and teach that same kind of theory.  Maybe you learn the good stuff when you go for an LLM?

Me:  That’s just another big scam.  It’s another two years of the same theory.  If you want to learn the real law you have to get a job, but those are scarce. 


Psychiatrist:  You are in a world of hurt.  Why did you go to law school again?

Me:  I figured it would supplement my degree nicely and make me a powerhouse in the working world.