Dybbuk's groveling apology.

When a Professor of Law, Philosophy, AND Human Values offers moral instruction, it would truly be insolent to react in any other fashion than with mea culpas and promises to mend one’s wicked ways.

 Over the past two years, I have published about 20 articles on JD Underground and have commented extensively in threads on "Inside the Law School Scam" and other law school related blogs. I have been highly critical of law professors who have minimal practice experience, or who publish reams of heavily-footnoted non-peer reviewed dreck that goes uncited and unread by courts and practitioners, or who waste their students’ time by stretching a few months worth of doctrine to fill three long years. I have noted, as have many, many others, that these law professors’ lucrative and cushy jobs are supported by the misplaced trust and astonishing debt loads of their students--kids who, outside the T13, will graduate with barely a coin-flip’s chance of ever having a real legal career.

But the Professor of Human Values & So Much Else rightly ignores all that, and focuses instead on a single over-the-top joke I posted in a JD Underground thread about a year ago about spanking an (imaginary) law professor with a wet slipper while being questioned about International Shoe v. Washington, 326 U.S. 310 (1945), plus a miniscule number of tasteless jokes or characterizations, again carefully selected from about twenty articles and several hundred blog comments.

I want to make it clear that I have taken this moral correction to heart. I can now offer assurances that I deeply, deeply respect the buttocks of all law professors, regardless of their gender, age, color, creed, and even regardless of their salary or their school’s job placement statistics. I appreciate that the buttocks of all law professors are for respecting, and NOT for spanking, whether with wet slippers or bundles of job rejection letters. And this is not merely basic human values, it is also wise practical counsel. You know, it is sometimes difficult to distinguish a law professor’s buttocks from his face, and vice versa. Case in point: a certain Professor of Law, Philosophy, and Human Values.